“Detoxing the heart of forgiveness”
Sermon Title: Detoxing the heart of forgiveness
Scripture: Matthew 18:21-35 (ESV)
Passage
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. “Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. “At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded. “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’ “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened.
“Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”. (Matthew 18:21-35)
The Message
This week, we dive into exploring the the tension of having been forgiven by God and our response in forgiving others in love and Christ-likeness. Rabbinical tradition taught that a repeated sin should be forgiven three times, but on the fourth, there was to be no forgiveness. Peter’s suggestion of forgiving seven times (v22) may seem generous under the Jewish law, yet Jesus challenges this further. In our passage, both servants were forgiven an immense amount of debt relative to their position - unthinkable in those times. We will look into the similarities of the weight of our sins before God and why a willingness to forgive is characteristic of those who have been saved by the Lord.
I: We ought to forgive others with the generosity the Father has forgiven us with. True freedom is not just in receiving forgiveness - true forgiveness includes granting forgiveness to others.
II: We may be forgiven but still live in prison. By not forgiving others, we remain shackled to bondage.
What forgiveness is not
Forgiveness is not forgetting or excusing what someone has done
Forgiveness is not that there are no consequences of what someone has done to you
Forgiveness is not that you no longer feel the pain of grieving
Forgiveness is not automatic reconciliation
Forgiveness is not that things will be as they once were
Five stages of forgiveness
Denial: refusal to acknowledge the underlying pain; life goes on normally
Anger: rumination over what the other person did to us; acutely aware of the pain and confusion
Bargaining: contemplate forgiving the other person only if they submit to our conditions
Depression: hopeless that the other person will change; state of self-blame
Acceptance: embrace what has happened and its effects on ourselves; we move past the incident
Forgiveness is utterly difficult, yet when we forgive, we have the power to act with a changed heart because of Christ. We break the perpetuating cycle of violence and pain.
How do we forgive?
Trust in the mystery of dying to receiving the newness of life. Choosing to forgive because the tire of living in the old life of not forgiving and harbouring bitterness in one’s heart is too overwhelmingly painful to continue living under. When we trust in the cross’ power, we know it is the way to salvation and better life. This way of life is marked by true freedom accompanied by newness of life.
Remember how God has forgiven you in Christ Jesus. Out of what we have already received from God, let us give and love abundantly into others. Let us remember before speaking or acting, the character of Christ we are being molded into.
Pray for the heart of forgiveness. The change we all desire ultimately comes from the strength and power of God Himself. Seek the desire to forgive and mend relationships directly from God. His promises to restore and renew a life that turns away from its old ways will always be answered.
Sermon reflection questions
In being forgiven by God, do you live in the true freedom given by Him?
What do you find the hardest in the process of forgiving another? How have you grown in this area?
Are there any areas of shame, guilt, embarrassment, or failure that you haven’t forgiven yourself in?
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